The Proverbs 31 Wife

Hanging around on the Christian message board Gentle Christian Mothers had quickly introduced me to the concept of the Proverbs 31 wife as the ideal Christian wife. I had never actually taken the time to read it. (Well, in my defense, I had not even owned a Bible whose translation I cared for until a couple weeks ago.) I had lots of assumptions about what it said, though, having never read it.

I assumed that Proverbs 31 was probably talking about how women should stay at home & raise their children, keep the home nice & tidy, & not look for too much for themselves. They should be ever-sacrificing, and better seen, not heard.

Imagine my pleasant surprise when I found the actual verse to be a little lovesong about a strong, capable, supportive & talented wife:

A truly good wife is the most precious treasure a man can find!

Her husband depends on her, and she never lets him down.

She is good to him every day of her life,

and with her own hands she gladly makes clothes.

She is like a sailing ship that brings food from across the sea.

She gets up before daylight to prepare food for her family and for her servants.

She knows how to buy land and how to plant a vineyard,

and she always works hard.

She knows when to buy or sell, and she stays busy until late at night.

She spins her own cloth,

and she helps the poor and the needy.

Her family has warm clothing, and so she doesn't worry when it snows.

She does her own sewing, and everything she wears is beautiful.

Her husband is a well-known and respected leader in the city.

She makes clothes to sell to the shop owners.

She is strong and graceful, as well as cheerful about the future.

Her words are sensible, and her advice is thoughtful.

She takes good care of her family and is never lazy.

Her children praise her, and with great pride her husband says,

"There are many good women, but you are the best!"

Charm can be deceiving, and beauty fades away, but a woman who honors the Lord deserves to be praised.

Show her respect--praise her in public for what she has done.

I have become more and more interested through the past several years of learning about how women (and men) were designed to live. What choices are we to make that leave us calm, centered, & fulfilled? I look for these things in the Bible and as far as my home life is concerned, it seems a gameplan is laid out in Proverbs 31.

The reason I'm so glad that I finally read the verse is that it has allowed me to buck contemporary thinking once again. Just last week I received in my inbox an email forwarded by woman after woman that made a joke about the number of things a woman does after she announces, "I'm going to bed" (about 40 things on the path to the bedroom) versus how many a man does (one -- gets up & goes to bed). After I read the email, I lived with a little more resentment for the next several days. It's popular to grumble how many things we women have to do while our husband sits lazily in his chair doing "whatever he wants."

Why does he not do the dishes? Why does he not help me clean? Why does he never pick up the slack? Why can't I eat & then sit down & relax instead of cleaning up the kitchen?

You know why?

She knows when to buy or sell, and she stays busy until late at night.

Of course I stay busy until late at night. Honestly, if I didn't, I'd get bored. Quickly. Sitting in the living room chair for several hours before bed would have my legs jumping & my skin crawling. I am meant...designed, if I may....to stay busy until late at night. And with that little verse, I let it go. All of the resentment that contemporary society tells me I should have is gone.

What are your resentments? Are they truly valid?